Toby, The Seoul Man: October 2009

Amie and I
31st July huh? Wow, please accept my dearest apologies for not updating for such a long time. Some might think that I have been plodding along doing nothing, others might think I may have gone into blog hiding, maybe given up on the whole ordeal, which to be honest it can be at times. Well, the truth is that for my last month in Korea, I was a bit of an emotional mess. Not sad to be leaving as such, but more just in a state of looseness. I had completely lost all drive for teaching, all drive for eating well, all drive for studying Korean, all drive for being social, all drive for my existence in some horror moments. I was strictly focused on getting home and seeing everybody and working my way through all those UK things that I had been dwelling on minute by minute since I'd booked my flight a few weeks back. To be brutally honest I felt a little lonely. My house became, all of a sudden, a very spacious airy hotel room. It lost its comfort and familiarity. Sleeping became a problem and I even began to see things in my room. I knew it was an accumulation of too many emotions. Sadness to be leaving, anxiety about what the next 6 months has for me, where to travel, therefore indecision, tiredness, confusion over the future, pressure on decisions, in regards to 'What job to do next?'........ Bla Bla Bla..... All sounds pretty deep, but it just boiled down to, I needed a break!!!!

Which is what I'm in now. Got back to the UK on the 1st September. Thrown into a hectic lifestyle of dinners here, coffees there, drinks here and more dinners, coffees and drinks there. Having such a wide berth of friends is great. Friends from University, friends from my first job, second job, third job, part time jobs, friends met in Korea now in the UK, ex-girlfriends, of course family and just people I love and wanted to see and be around again. Not to mention a couple of 'old school' reunions. One reunion with a small crew from Bungay High school days, last time we were all together was 8 years ago. What I'm trying to say is that I had a very busy schedule. So much so, that I had to start a diary, and actually use and live by it. I've always been cautious about starting a diary. I've always been proud to say that I can handle my 'goings on' without use of a diary and cope fine with my competent mind, but this, rapid fire, series of catch ups required careful and precise scheduling. Not at all complaining in the slightest. I ate many deliciously prepared foods and drank many delicately poured wines, along with perfectly executed catch up chats. I was living the life of a ra-ra king..... No work, lunching and dining may way through the working week. All this soon starting hitting hard on the bank balance, so I had to sit back.

Rick and I then thought that we'd would both tick a box on our 'must do' list and head to New York for a bit. We booked it, with thanks to Air France, and started our planning. 6 nights it would be. Emails from past New Yorkers got us on our way. We landed and were thrown into the deep end. Our hostel was in Harlem, ok it was East Harlem, and South South East Harlem at that. But, when we stepped out of the subway at 103rd Street, I tell you it was more of a culture shock than landing in Seoul. Can't explain what the feeling was, but just felt out of place. Soon got comfortable and started to enjoy New York for what New York is all about. The yellow taxis, the NYPD, the diverseness of everything there. The people, the architecture, the smells, the atmospheres, the attitudes, all combining to create the New York experience. On leaving New York, I decided that it wasn't all that I had cracked it up to be. Cities are cities and most tick in the same way as the next one, and the last one. I spent 5 days in Tokyo and came out with the same conclusion. To really thrive and immerse yourself into a city, and therefore get the essentials out of it, one has to live there for a healthy duration, not just a jolly 7 day tourist visit.

Whilst in New York, Rick and I went to a predominately Korean area. We both love Korean food so thought that we would hunt out some decent Korean BBQ. We found it and found ourselves enjoying it as if it was our first time. During this specific meal, something hit me. I remember the feeling as if it had just happened now, as I'm typing 'typing'. I placed my first mouthful of juicy BBQ-ed pork belly into my mouth and I decided there and then, that I need to get back to Korea, as soon as I possibly could. For the next 24 hours I racked my brain on what I could do. I then saw a video of my old kids on-line, thanks to Steph Teacher. This acted as the confirmation that I would be going back to Korea when possible. Although I didn't need confirmation, as such, as I already knew what I needed to do. I needed to go to Korea and study Korean.

On our return to London I started a little research and discovered the suitable remedy for my illness. A 150 hour Korean course at Sogang University, starting December 1st and finishing February 18th. This gives me enough time to organise my life before starting, and also fits in nicely with starting a new job from March 1st, which is the new schooling year in Korea. So, enrolling was next and enroll I did. Paid tuition fees, booked flights and off I go again. Now it's 24th October, and in four weeks I'll be off.

Sorry for the boring recap on my life, but thought that I would bring us up to speed, and use this as an opportunity to launch my blog into its next generation. On returning to Korea I will bring a new spin on the blog. Not sure exactly what it'll be yet, but maybe a makeover and some kind of format change. Stay tuned......

Some pics from the last couple months.