Spurs start badly and so do I..............

The picture will be the happiest thing you see or hear in the next few paragraphs, so savour it now........ Red and Blue class during Speech Contest 2008.

Not sure where to begin. How about this? Right now I feel stressed, frustrated, run-down, lethargic, confused, betrayed and redundant. Why? Quite simply I haven’t got a working visa in Korea from the 4^th September. Why? Quite simply, I need a police check from the UK. Why? Because the new law in Korea asks so. So! Why is that such a problem? just get one! Easier said than done. In my beloved home country, the UK, it takes anything up to forty days to receive it, not including postage times they say. Why? I have no idea. In Korea you can order you police check and have it signed off and presented to you within 24 hours. Why? Because that’s how things can work. In fact you can have your entire workforce checked off within 24 hours. Our country, the United Kingdom, is obsessed with application forms. We love paperwork. We love small print. We seem to love filing systems. We’ve even created job roles specific to filing.

Isn’t it time we started relying on computers more? We are 8 years into the 21^st century now and we’re still applying for things through paper applications. A process that has so many negative and destructive aspects. “Lost in post”, “Postage back an forth ads on a week to the process”, “mislaying legal documents”, “if any errors then whole process has to start again, i.e. fill out application form again, this time use BLACK CAPITALS – Why?? Why?? Why??” I pray for the day that our country sits down and relaxes a little. Stop being so damn anal and break away from the paper past.

One aspect of this particular process that I’m currently three days into was false information given on the application form. It clearly says, in slightly bolder and blacker text, that you should enclose x2 copies of identification. I did so, then on receiving the copies they then say that it’s new policy to have original copies and not ‘copies’. But they haven’t updated this on their TRUSTY application form. Finally, just to reiterate the pathetic-ness of our anal and vintage system in the UK, when my father went into the police station to hand in the forms etc the policeman kindly sympathised with my fathers matching concerns and the policeman actually said “I could look up your criminal record here and now and print it here and now”……… do I need to say anymore??????!!!!! Really???

OK, so maybe you’re thinking why didn’t I start this process two months ago. Then there wouldn’t be this rush to get it tied up now, before the 4^th September. Well, I did my duties. I asked my boss if I needed a police check in order to renew my contract and get a second year visa. He said no and the rest will soon be history. Hopefully. I won’t go into any further details on conversations with my boss, as I’m not into kiss and tell, but lets just say that I now face 2/3 weeks of unemployment and non-payment, due to OTHER peoples misuse of accessible information. So I’m now set for budget eating, budget entertaining, no fun and frolics and finally a whole lot of time to get even more frustrated at the turn of events.

Welcome to my second year!!!!!!!!!!

More to follow………….

ARRRRGGGGHHHHHHH !!!!!!!!!!

Landed

I didn't fly Quantas

OK. I’m back in the land of teaching and much much more. I have just finished my first day of teaching, I was a bit rusty at first and think I will be for a few more jet lagged days. But the future is bright and that is all I can think of right now. I’ll give you all a brief, or detailed, insight into my last three weeks in the UK.

Here is a list:

Ate bread.
Ate lots of bread.
Threw big stones into the sea, at Walberswick, for Biffer to try and find.
Sunbathed in my mothers garden.
Got sunburnt, sunbathing in my mothers garden.
Bought some shorts in Topman.
Ate numerous English fry-ups.
Watched Emmerdale, Eastenders, Hollyoaks, Sky Sports News 24, Re-runs of Friends, Channel 4 news, Come dine with me, The Charlotte Church show, all on TV.
Ate a roast dinner.
Slept on 4 sofas.
Woke up with a view of Highbury and then walked alongside the Emirates Stadium. Huge apologies Yids.
Had a delicious BBQ at Fran and Rich’s yard.
Rummaged through my old clothes and picked out some treats.
Overheard a pathetic argument in Sainsbury’s.
Took 2 hours to get from Acton to Balham.
Updated my Oyster Card a few too many times.
Watched Spurs destroy Norwich 5-0 at Carrow Road.
Witnessed Spurs humiliate Roma 5-0 at White Hart Lane.
Roasted some Sausages, accompanied them with some Flageolet beans and mixed veg.
Bought a new extra strong Dyna-Band.
Been to two house parties, not knowing the host.
Taken two trips in London black cabs.
Witnessed Michael Vaughan retire and Kevin Peiterson step in.
Bought something online at Harrods.com
Questioned peoples rudeness in public places.
Learnt how to say, Optimistic, Peaceful, Beautiful, Interesting, Funny, Romantic, Awkward, Strange, Cool Collected, Sincere, Fat, Thin, Big, Small, Long and Wide in Korean.
Read no books.
Bought a bigger and more practical suitcase.
Bought a bigger and more practical hand luggage suitcase.
Witnessed what a butchers should look and smell like.
Saw my Mother, Father, Step-mother, Step-father, Sister and nephew. And Grandmother and aunties. Rufus has transformed from a big baby to a small boy.
Watched England Vs South Africa at the Oval.
Not gone to the gym.
Wanted to go to the gym.
Missed eating Bi-Bim-Bap.
Discovered Lorna is having a baby.
Got served a baked potato with NO Beans (good idea though Rick)
Packed my bags.
Ate my last breakfast.
Went to airport………..

p.s. had a great time.

I’m sure there is more, but a little dazed still……… more to come, maybe.

Free Tasting Session......... Sign up now.

I have been in the UK for nearly three weeks now. I know, for a fact, that you have all been sitting on the edge of your seats, like a dog waiting for its dry breakfast, eagerly wanting to know what I have been doing here. Well, I'm going to give you a little taste right now. Once I have returned to my adopted home I will divulge all the details.
For now, some imagery to get those taste buds flowing and to relieve the stress formed on the edge of your seat.

Biffer the Dog........


Alistar Cook defending the South African attack. Man, I was close huh??? (Sigma Lens, 70-300mm - RRP £99.99)


A street in W1.


My Dad's van, on location. A days work??? surely you didn't go home and work.... did you??

Before I start again

I'm a few days away from returning to my adopted home, South Korea. My kind mother dug out some old snaps of me as a child, it provoked me to think of my kids in Korea, and therefore get back on the blog-band-wagon.

This first image is of Myself and my sister Eleanor. If you can pull your focus away from the £3 sized gap in Eleanor's teeth, you can see my eye for style started at a tender age. The predominately white t-shirt is scattered with multi-sized black dots. Rockin!


'Hey there Mr. Sweet Tooth' is the title for this second image. This is the moment my mother found me nestled in the cupboards with hands, fingers and face all residing within the jar of the strawberries finest, jam.


The final picture speaks for itself in terms of style. Although I have to thank my mother for this one. It was, if my memory serves me well, a street fair in the local village and I was dressed up to join a specific parade.